My grandson
died almost 8 years ago. When someone you love dies it can be a terrible shock
or you may be prepared for it after a long illness, or be prepared because they
were very old.
My grandson
was 21 when he died and it was a terrible shock to everyone in the family. He
died because he drank heavily and then fell asleep on a soft sofa with his face
down. He never woke up. The coroner said he had seen this happen to young men
quite often.
His mother
and I poured out our hearts to God. We talked about it with him for a long
time. When the pain seemed too much we reached up to God and he healed us. He
was a great comfort, and I don’t know how we would have made it through without
his help.
But my
grandson’s brother and my other daughter did not do this. My daughter would not
speak about what happened and didn’t want us to either. She bottled up her sadness
and rage until she had a mental breakdown about 4 years later. She went to
counseling and got better.
My other
grandson is still suffering. He and his brother were extremely close. He found
the pain to be too much to handle and a few years after the death he started
taking drugs to dull the pain. Eventually he became addicted to heroin. I know
I have told this story before, but this time I wanted to share how important it
is to talk to God or a counselor about the loss of someone you love.
He was in
such bad shape after a few years of heroin that he knew he had to get off it. Also,
he was tempted to start stealing in order to buy it. His mother did everything
she could to help him. She wanted him to go into a rehab center and paid
$5,000. He went for one day and half a night. He doesn’t feel comfortable being
around people.
I didn’t
know that when you quit heroin your legs hurt so much you want to cut them off.
The pain is awful.
My daughter lived with him for three months helping him
through withdrawal. He went to the government program where they give you methadone.
Oh, how that helped him! How grateful we are to the government and what they
had done for him. He is still on methadone and doing very well physically.
But he has
never dealt with the heavy grief in his heart. The worst month for him is
August because that is when his brother died. It isn’t quite August and he is in
a bad place right now. My daughter is going to see him tonight. He lives in the
next town.
I texted him
last night and told him to pray to God for peace of mind and don’t stop asking
until he gets it. I have done that when I was depressed and God always came
through.
I remember
saying to God, “I’m not leaving this bed until I feel better.” And I kept
praying. And then I felt better; I could face the day.
Now, when I
pray, I also ask for joy and happiness in my day. I know God wants me to have
peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. The Bible says that, and what God has said,
he will do. Sometimes we just have to keep asking.
This makes
me think of Jacob, when he was wrestling with God. He said, “I won’t let you go
until you bless me.” You would think that was pretty pushy of Jacob, but
apparently, God didn’t. He praised Jacob and gave him a new name: Israel.
Jacob’s
story can inspire us to do the same. Don’t let go of God until he blesses you.
The Bible says, “pursue peace,” so ask for it every time your heart is troubled,
and keep asking.
