I thought I’d
revisit the topic of depression, since I am so closely acquainted with it. I’d
been feeling happy for many months, then depression hit again. Every morning.
Again. I knew it might be caused by my youngest daughter and my granddaughter leaving
to live in Canmore. But I didn’t see why this sadness was lasting so long.
After a few weeks of this, I asked God about it. Before this, I had just
been asking for help and quoting Scripture. That wasn’t working this time. I
realized when I asked God why this was happening and why nothing was working, I
should have asked him many days ago. Because God always answers my questions.
Sometimes he answers right away; sometimes in days. So, I waited for an answer
and kept my eyes open.
I believe I
got an answer the next day. The answer came through Christian books I was
reading, podcasts by Annie F. Downs, and Joyce Meyer on TV. She was the one who
showed me how important it is to quote Scripture out loud. There is power in
that. Evil spirits don’t stay around when the Word of God is quoted.
That
morning, Joyce was speaking about depression. This is what I learned.
1. Believe
God loves me. Not an easy one for me, although it is getting easier.
2. Write in
a notebook every time God does something for me, be grateful and thank Him. I
do thank him many times, but not daily and I don’t write it down. I thought of
all the things he has done lately for my family, really important things, and
felt better.
3. Believe
God is working. Now I’d heard this from Joyce a few years ago and it changed
the way I felt about my family. I used to worry about them and I would say this
to myself, I did believe it and this brought peace. But I never used this
phrase to help myself – to really believe God was working for me every day. To
believe that actually helps me believe he loves me.
4. Don’t get
discouraged because you have to learn and remember spiritual truths over and
over. This is a big one for me, and it was by listening to interviews on Annie
F. Downs’ podcast where I found a lot of Christians have found this to be true
in their lives. I used to wonder, when I would learn something new that helped
me, why didn’t it stick with me? Why would I keep forgetting? Why was I so
dense?
Apparently,
I’m not alone in this. And I suppose that is why we must read Scripture every
day. God’s ways are so much higher and so different from our ways, it takes a
lifetime to learn them. And I am thankful God is super patient.
Thus, after a full day of searching for God’s
answer, I believe I have found it in these four ways of living and thinking. I
don’t feel depressed today, I feel blessed. Not that I am supposed to rely on
my feelings, but it is truly lovely not to feel a dark cloud circling my head.
