Telling God Alone.

In my last post I wrote about watching too much television with my mom and having a struggle with that. Of course, God came through and helped me. As I said, Mom told me she would like to play some computer games. Well, that is what she wants to do every night instead of watching TV. I’m so thankful to God. Now I have more time to listen to Christian podcasts, read books about God and to pray.

In one podcast, a man said something like, “If you were raised in a legalistic, fundamentalist religion and are now free of it, be grateful for your upbringing. You grew up knowing the Lord’s name.” I agree with him and have thought about that a lot.

My sisters and I used to be upset at our religious upbringing, but now I am grateful. Because of my parents and my church, I have always believed there is a God; I’ve always known he hears and sees me; I’ve always known there is eternal life for those who follow him. I may have been terrified of God and when I sinned I thought he would kill me with a bolt of lightening, but hey, it was a start! I’ve certainly never been tempted to be an atheist.

Something happened this week that showed me how good Joyce Meyer’s advice is on not telling people when you are hurt by someone. I thought about telling only my husband but I realized there would be no point in that. He couldn’t change anything and would also feel sad that I was sad.

I don’t want to say what this person did. It was someone in my family. When it happened, I felt like a knife went through my heart. So, I spent time talking with God about the situation. I thought about what Jesus would do. I think he would have felt hurt, but he would have just accepted what happened. That night I prayed God would take away the pain in my heart and when I woke in the morning the pain was totally gone.

That day, another family member came over and talked with me about what happened. I didn’t bring it up, but she knew about it. What she said made me feel so much better. The situation was clarified and I could see there was no malice at all involved in it. That night we all went out to dinner and had a perfectly wonderful time together.

I love God’s way of dealing with our hurts. I love this way of not telling people I am sad etc. I know there are times we must confront people. Jesus said to go to those who hurt you and talk with them. I have done that before; sometimes it works out great, other times not so much. What I especially love is how God tells us not to spread these stories all over the place. We shouldn’t call our friends and tell them how horribly someone has treated us. We should go to God alone and he will help us.

Hurt Feelings? Tozer has the Answer.

Since my last post, I've been thinking and talking with God about the rage I felt against a person I am close to. I wanted to know why I felt that way and what to do about it so it wouldn't happen again. I know God loves me as I am, but like Paul, I strive to do better.

I've been reading, "The Pursuit of God," by A.W. Tozer. One of the chapters is on meekness. I knew God said Moses was the meekest man on earth and I knew Jesus called himself meek. They both had strong personalities and were leaders, so I wasn't sure what meekness was. But Tozer explains the "Meek Man" and from that, I could see my problem.


Here is an excerpt from that chapter:

"The heart’s fierce effort to protect itself from every slight, to shield its touchy honor from the bad opinion of friend and enemy, will never let the mind have rest. Continue this fight through the years and the burden will become intolerable.

Yet the sons of earth are carrying this burden continually, challenging every word spoken against them, cringing under every criticism, smarting under each fancied slight, tossing sleepless if another is preferred before them. Such a burden as this is not necessary to bear. Jesus calls us to His rest, and meekness is His method. 

The meek man cares not at all who is greater than he, for he has long ago decided that the esteem of the world is not worth the effort. He develops toward himself a kindly sense of humor and learns to say, “Oh, so you have been overlooked? They have placed someone else before you? They have whispered that you are pretty small stuff after all? And now you feel hurt because the world is saying about you the very things you have been saying about yourself? Only yesterday you were telling God that you were nothing, a mere worm of the dust. Where is your consistency? Come on, humble yourself and cease to care what men think.”

 He (the humble man) has accepted God’s estimate of his own life. He knows he is as weak and helpless as God has declared him to be, but paradoxically, he knows at the same time that he is, in the sight of God, more important than angels. In himself, nothing; in God, everything. That is his motto.

He knows well that the world will never see him as God sees him and he has stopped caring. He rests perfectly content to allow God to place His own values. He will be patient to wait for the day when everything will get its own price tag and real worth will come into its own. Then the righteous shall shine forth in the kingdom of their Father. He is willing to wait for that day. 

In the meantime, he will have attained a place of soul rest. As he walks on in meekness he will be happy to let God defend him. The old struggle to defend himself is over. He has found the peace which meekness brings."

After reading this a few times, I could see that what I wanted was for the other person to think well of me. I want him to think I’m terrific, and when I feel he doesn’t then I freak out. I’m way too sensitive of my ego. I depend too much on what others think of me. It is enough that God thinks a lot of me. If I have that clearly in my mind, I think that I won’t care what others say to me. I can just keep living happily in the light and joy of my relationship with God.

Am I Casting a Shadow or a Light?

Who is God?

Someone to take your troubles to.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."  1 Peter 5:7

"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken."
Psalm 55:22

"Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge."  Psalm 62:8

Who Am I?

For the second time this month, I heard some Christian advice I need to follow. This is the advice: Always share your strong feelings with God before you share how you feel with another person. If you are hurt, depressed or angry, talk with Jesus about it before you breath a word to anyone.

The people who said this explained that a lot of people cannot bear your pain; that it is too much for them. There is probably nothing they can do to help, so go to God. He can bear everything.

This reminded me of the times I was feeling so hopeless and depressed about who I was and what I was going through. I shared some things with my daughter that upset her terribly. I wish I had kept quiet. I've many times shared my deepest pain with my husband. I think this has been hard for him to bear.

I've learned lately that God is enough. I can share these thoughts with Him and he helps me. It just helps to rant and rave about something with God to. At least I get all the feelings out there in the open. Since I know he accepts me and can help me with all things, I usually don't feel the need to tell anyone else. I think I wanted sympathy and understanding; but God has all that to give me too.

I've also read that sharing your dark feelings and thoughts casts a shadow over the lives of people you talk with. I don't want to put a shadow in someone's life. I want to do the opposite; I want to glow with God's light.