A bog.
I was re-reading
Psalm 40 and was moved to gratefulness again.
Psalm 40:
I waited patiently for
the Lord;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the Lord
and put their trust in him.
I do feel God has lifted me out of a miry bog, or quicksand. I
was sinking because of the memories of my father sexually abusing me. I was
sinking in shame, mental illness and depression. But through the years he
lifted me up out of that.
It didn’t happen quickly. It takes time for the mind to heal. Therapists also helped me. Am
I completely well body and soul? No. But I am now standing on the rock, Jesus.
My feet are no longer slipping and sliding. I understand how to run to him, to
pour out my heart to him and to let him give me peace. Perfect peace? Yes and
no.
You keep him in
perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Isaiah 26:3
I used to think that when we had perfect peace it would never go
away. But I was wrong. Our peace is disrupted when life brings obstacles or
tragedy. Satan messes with our peace when he whispers negative thoughts to us.
So, we have to go back again to God and tell him how we feel and
ask for his peace. We need to go again and again through the day and quote
uplifting Bible verses praising God. Satan cannot stay where God is being
praised and trusted. This is what I think Paul meant when he wrote, “Fight the
good fight of faith.”
I learned most of this through Joyce Meyer. I watch her TV show
every day. She focuses on how to live the Christian life. She was raped by her
father for most of her childhood. She understands.
I still have a mental illness. I still hear my little girl
inside say things. But I don’t mind too much. I try my best to stay away from
things that trigger me. I can honestly say I am mostly happy and at peace. It
is a wonderful feeling. He lifted me up out of the slimy pit, out of the mire
and mud.
Psalm 40 is a Messianic psalm. Commentators have said the
feelings expressed in this psalm are what Jesus felt. I’m going to write about
that next time.
