Thursday, 28 January 2016

Running Away from Home.

Who am I?

I'm a runner.

I'm 65 years old and I'm learning things about aging that aren't pleasant. Along with the physical problems comes the emotional ones. I think I have done a good job in facing this last leg of my journey with God; well, I haven't, but God has. He has shown me a lot about myself. He can do that when you have lots of time on your hands.

One thing I've learned lately is that living in the same city for over 35 years can be hard when you are older. Everywhere I go there are memories, memories of doing things with my children and grandchildren. Happy memories and sad memories. Whether happy or sad, the memories brought tears to my eyes today. I was out and about today, which is kind of rare for me, and everywhere I turned I saw the grandchildren I love so much.

When I got home, I said to my husband, "I wish we could move away for our retirement. I'd like to be somewhere new." I explained to him why I felt this way, but he reminded me we need to be near his doctors and hospital. We do need to be near a hospital, but Vancouver has a good one. The problem with Vancouver is that is where I babysat my grandsons. Happy and sad memories there too.

I realized tonight it is just me being me again. Always wanting to run away from pain; thinking I can find relief in a change of scenery. Running away instead of running to God.

Years ago, when I had a mental breakdown, I ran off to stay at my sister's place near Las Vegas. I ended up staying there for 3 months. It was a nice rest, but the same problems were there when I went home. After that, we would all joke about me "going Vegas" when I was depressed. Yes, there was that possibility! At least I had somewhere fun to go!

Who is God?

Someone who is used to having people run away.

Adam and Eve ran away and hid from God. I think God has an advantage in the game of hide & seek, so of course God sought them out and found them.

Jonah ran away, but God wouldn't let him go. For some unknown reason, God wanted Jonah to preach to and save some sinners. Sinners whom Jonah hated! And I guess that's why God chose him. God has a good sense of humor, and he will do some strange stuff to help us learn to love.

Elijah ran away because he was afraid of dying. God ran after him; he gave him food, water and rest until Elijah was ready to talk things out.

All of Jesus' friends ran away when Jesus was arrested because they were afraid they would be arrested too. But Jesus told them beforehand it would happen so they wouldn't be too ashamed or discouraged. Then, when they didn't believe the women who told them Jesus rose from the dead, Jesus sought them out and entered the room where they met each day.

God is pretty humble. He runs after us every time. He's pretty patient and loving too. I'm so glad we have a God like that. One who will chase after us and maybe say something like he said to Elijah, "Why are you here?"