Monday, 31 July 2017
Sunday, 23 July 2017
It has been a roller coaster ride with my mother the past month. She is now back in the hospital because I injured myself and can barely walk. I’m using her cane now, which is kind of ironic.
While taking care of my mom, my feet started to hurt. I thought it was just more fibromyalgia, but it turned out to be Plantar Fasciitis. It was painful, but manageable. Then a few days ago, I twisted my foot while helping Mom. A pain shot up my leg and that was it – I couldn’t walk.
Mom rarely slept more than 1-2 hours at a time. She needed to be turned over constantly. That night, my husband stayed up and took care of her. We sent for an ambulance in the morning to take her to the hospital because we had no one to take care of her. The hospital wasn’t too happy, but there was nothing else we could do.
The people at the hospital thought Mom wasn’t sick, just recuperating from her hip operation. But she was sick – very sick. Even her doctor wouldn’t believe me until Mom stayed overnight, and the nurses told everyone how sick Mom was. Her tests came back normal – that’s why they wouldn’t believe me. Well, tests or not, I knew she was very sick and dying.
The second night she was there, someone made a mistake and she was given two sleeping pills. She went into kidney failure. They actually admitted to me they almost killed her! I was surprised by the admission.
We went to see her again today. She is the same, except she was shivering all over because she was cold. We got three more blankets for her and she finally warmed up. She told us the nurses were all wonderful and very kind. I was happy to hear that.
I read a Psalm to my mom when I visited. She loved it so much. Here it is:
You have searched me, Lord,
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
How vast is the sum of them!
Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.
Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139 - Abridged
Saturday, 1 July 2017
My mom got an infection after hip surgery. They didn’t know until she had been sent to a rehabilitation center. In my mind she seemed too sick to do exercises and I was right. We took her home to take care of her ourselves.
The government sent a nurse to our house to evaluate her. They wanted to know if she could exercise and teach me how to take care of her. The nurse was lovely. She met the family and then went into Mom’s room and talked with her and me.
She could see Mom was too weak and sick to do any exercises. She explained how much easier it would be for me to take care of mother if we had a hospital bed. She said the Red Cross loaned them for no cost for 6 – 9 months. After that we have to buy our own. So, we ordered one from the Red Cross. We also are able to have two nurse’s aides come and give mother a bath once a week and take care of her for three hours while my husband and I go out. The cost is covered by the government.
Mom’s infection was cured; now she is just tired and wants to sleep day and night. She isn’t eating anything, but drinks water, Boost and orange juice. I have read that when we are dying, we no longer have an appetite. This is our body helping us die peacefully.
My husband, daughters and granddaughters have been helping me. Mom is restless and wants to turn over in bed often. Actually this is good for her because of bed sores. I would have to move her every two hours anyway. When she had the infection she wanted to be turned about every 15 minutes. That was extremely tiring. My husband and I took turns so we could sleep.
I bought a book called, “Meditating on the Psalms,” by John Eaton. I’ve been enjoying it very much. He writes about “alphabetic” or “ acrostic” Psalms. The poet begins the song with the A of their alphabet and each line begins with the next letter. I thought I would try to write one myself. Here it is:
All the Lord does is beautiful.
Beautiful in love, wisdom and mercy.
Call upon the Lord, and he will hear you.
Depend on his saving grace.
Everything that breathes, the Lord has made.
From the ant to the whale, God made us all.
He reigns in the heavens.
In his throne room he rules over all.
Justice and righteousness are the foundation of his throne.
Keep your eyes, heart and mind upon the Lord.
Look on him who is perfect.
Many are his marvelous words and works.
Never lean upon man; lean upon God.
Open your heart to him.
Pour out your thoughts and sorrows.
Quietly, he will strengthen you.
Rest in his everlasting love.
Surely, he will save your soul.
Tenderly he will lead you.
Under the shadow of his wings you will find refuge.
Vast are his thoughts towards you.
Why should we worry or be troubled?
eXalt his name in all the earth.
Your heart he will fill with peace and love.
Zion is his habitation and from there he will reign over us.